Recently I was approached by an acquaintance that only had one question for me, OK, two questions. The first was “You’re not dead?”, and the second was “What in the hell have you been up to?”. The answer to that is quite long – 15 years long.
In 2007 I met B Daddy. In 2007 I married B Daddy. In 2008 B Daddy got orders to Fort Bliss, Texas. In 2011 B Daddy got orders to Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri. In 2012 B Daddy got orders to Fort Belvoir, Virginia. In 2016 B Daddy decided he was moving on, and my story with B Daddy ends, and my story begins again.
Since all the spawn had moved out east, I decided to stay in Virginia. The grandspawn was in elementary school, and daycare is expensive, so I got a 4 story townhouse with Dra, Nik, and Kai. I went back to the bar and restaurant industry, and decided that living with the girls gave me time to lick my wounds, and an excuse not to date. I worked mornings, I picked up Kai after school, and I spent evenings with the girls. It worked for me. I started to heal.
After about a year, I decided to dip my toe into the dating pool. The water was not cold, it was gross. Gross and slimy and did I mention gross? Listening to co-workers, I chose to dip my toeinto Tinder. Which was actually what some of those men wanted – pictures of my feet. One even asked if I would meet him, and bring a pair of socks for him. No wannabe rich diamond buying swindler for me. I was not that lucky. It was the most awful experience ever. Entertaining at times, but awful. I did meet one guy that I thought might be interesting. Right up until I noticed the fishnet pantyhose hanging on a chair in several photos. I was miffed, assuming he had a significant other. Nope. They were his. He proved it by sending me a photo of him wearing them. That was the end of that potential relationship. It was not so much the cross dressing as it was that he had nicer legs than I did. I had to draw a line somewhere.
I gave it a few months, then the kids introduced me to Plenty of Fish. The first guy I met was PERFECT. A perfect friend. He is a great guy, and we are still friends. Then came a guy who lived in his parent’s basement. Not one to judge, I talked to him for about a month, then agreed to meet in person. He stood me up. After that came a guy who owned his own home, was a government contractor, competed in triathalons, and made me feel like a teenager. We had a few dates, and then it was time to maybe take it further. The address he gave me was a hotel. Make that motel. Why was a man that owned his own home taking me to a motel? Perhaps there was not enough room in bed for both me and his wife. Nope, nope, and nope.
It had been a couple of years since “The Text”, and mom called from Colorado to tell me that she had to have a knee replacement. I drove home to help her out. A couple of weeks turned into a month. Mom lives in a small town of 605. She lives off grid. A month of very little in the way of electronics, little to no social media, and lots of long talks with mom. Talks eventually turned to why I was staying in Virginia, where I hated life. I hated that I worked 19 miles from home, and my commute was roughly 90 minutes, if I was lucky. The reality was there was nothing to keep me in Virginia, other than the spawn. I did not want to leave them, but it was time to admit that I could not heal while living in the middle of a rat race. Mom and I looked at a few houses before I went back to Virginia, but did not really find anything that we liked. We decided to keep looking, and I headed home to Virginia.
I was not even back to Virginia when mom sent me a text to tell me that she had put an offer on a house. The offer was accepted, and she would close in 30 days. It was August, 2017, I returned to Virginia, told the spawn the news, packed my crap, and by January 2018, I was on my way back to Colorado, with the youngest spawn. He was not happy on the east coast either, and needed a change. I have to admit, the moment that I saw the Rocky Mountains, I cried. I was back. I was home.
A couple of years later, and the pandemic would hit, and the rest of the spawn would also find their ways west. Nik and Kai are in the Denver area. Dra is with me. Cody is married and living nearby. Where it started, it shall end. I am older, slightly wiser, and still healing.
And still single. Despite what may have been whispered in my ear, I am OK with it. I have a job that I love, I joined a pool league, and I have my four legged beasties.
I am good. And getting better.
Verbal Assassinations 